


When Everyone Feels the Same

by Sumiregawa Nenene (Shadowblight)



Category: Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha | Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha
Genre: Female Friendship, Friendship, Gen, Grief, Heartwarming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-20
Updated: 2010-12-20
Packaged: 2017-10-13 21:59:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/142146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowblight/pseuds/Sumiregawa%20Nenene
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Several days after the incident with the Tome of the Night Sky, Nanoha and Hayate have a conversation about the haunting issues that linger.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When Everyone Feels the Same

**Author's Note:**

  * For [extellier](https://archiveofourown.org/users/extellier/gifts).



> All right, so this turned out a lot more "slice of life" than it did "MSLN," but the piece was requested to be heartwarming, so hopefully I got that right at least.
> 
> I'm really sorry I couldn't make it post-Strikers per the details! I just wasn't feeling the inspiration on that count; I had the time to re-watch As, and not really enough to re-watch Strikers.
> 
> I really still do hope you enjoy it, Yule-prompter. ♥

The Midoriya Café habitually closed at 8PM on New Year's Eve, and this year was certainly no exception to the others.

Nanoha's father escorted the final customers, laden with not only their own purchases but also whatever it seemed his own family and friends attending this evening would not eat, out the door no later than half-past eight. He turned and smiled at the sight of his youngest daughter talking animatedly with her steadily growing group of friends. "Nanoha-chan, I think you've been able to sit since I locked the door earlier. Don't you think we should finish cleaning up so we can go out this evening?"

"Uh," Nanoha started eloquently, "yes, of course!"

The peal of giggles that followed was music to his ears as he headed into the kitchen.

Nanoha then turned back to the table. "This is so exciting, being able to celebrate New Year's so soon after Christmas with you all!"

"Isn't it?" Hayate grinned, perhaps what seemed a bit forcefully to those who didn't know her. Thankfully those at the table did. "I hope Fate-chan shows up in that outfit that Admiral Lindy gave her for Christmas that Arf's been talking up a storm about."

Alisa laughed. "She looked like a Christmas tree herself when that happened."

"Fate-chan's just shy," Suzuka said softly, a slight blush in her own cheeks.

"She always has been," Nanoha replied thoughtfully. Then, in a more serious tone than anything else at the table had been that night, she continued, "I think she just doesn't know how to handle being told she's worthy of attention."

There was a silence among them that started off with more of a curious air that slowly became more uncomfortable the longer it stretched on.

"Ah, but I'm sure too much attention would also be a bad thing, too," Nanoha floundered. "I mean, we could try to think something up to help her, but it shouldn't be too pushy..." The crease in her brow and the way she leaned against the table fretfully was enough to break the mood, and they all giggled again.

"Ahem," a rough interjection came from the doorway of the kitchen. They all turned to see Nanoha's sister standing in the doorway. "Dad told me to make sure you'd started wiping down the counters. What am I supposed to tell him now?"

"Going!" Nanoha squeaked frantically. She stood so suddenly that she bumped her knee on the table, causing the items on it to clatter. She winced and grabbed a dish rag from the bucket in front of her. "Meet you guys at Alisa's in about an hour or so?"

"You got it!" Alisa smiled. "I'll make sure dinner's ready. You just bring the sweets!"

"Mm!" the red-haired girl affirmed.

Nanoha's sister shook her head and returned to the kitchen.

Hayate's eyes sparkled suddenly. "I'd like to stay here if it isn't too imposing," she announced. "I can help with the tables and chairs."

Her three friends paused and seemed skeptical. Still, Hayate was actually used to those looks, used to the disbelief that she would do things normally in her wheelchair, so she let it pass. "Are you sure, Hayate-chan?" Suzuka asked.

"I don't mind, and my parents wouldn't either, I'm sure," Nanoha said, avoiding eye contact by walking toward the main counter, scrubbing a bit, "but won't your knights worry if you're not there to meet them at Alisa's place?"

Hayate smiled and felt the warmth of pride again as she thought of them, and she wondered fleetingly if that would ever wear off for her. "My family will be fine. I'm sure Vita-chan will be a handful, but she usually is when it comes to being separated from me for more than even a short while."

Nanoha just laughed nervously at this; she'd only spent a scant few days around Vita where the red knight wasn't trying to single her out for a one-on-one all-out battle, and it was still difficult to adjust for her, especially after the looks and confrontation during Christmas.

"I'll even call Shamal right now," Hayate offered, humming some Christmas carol as she dug her phone out of her pocket.

Alisa looked to the other two in turn, eyebrows raised. "Well then, I guess that's that!" she said frankly, and yet somehow it really _did_ seem positive.

Nanoha performed a mocking salute to Alisa, and Hayate's conversation with Shamal was well-timed; the two girls leaving were able to receive a wave from Hayate just as the door was shutting. Nanoha came around to the front long enough to lock the door again and gave the café a once-over. "Just a moment then, I'll find another cloth."

"Okay," Hayate replied politely and wheeled around the table to reach for the bucket. "I'll get fresh water for this. It's behind the counter, in the corner, isn't it?"

"Yep." Nanoha smiled. "You're pretty observant, Hayate-chan."

This actually struck Hayate a bit deeper than it should have, reminding her of her blindness to what her knights had really been doing the past six months, and the laugh she gave seemed flat. "I'm not so sure about that, Nanoha-chan."

Nanoha tilted her head questioningly, but Hayate either didn't see or was ignoring it. For now, Nanoha decided to do a tactical retreat. As much time as she'd had to consider what she could say to Fate those several months back, then more recently to Vita, in an attempt to get them to talk back to her, she wasn't so sure she could come up with something quite on the fly like this. "There should be a few spare in the storage room through the back of the kitchen. I'll be right back."

"Sure." Hayate carefully lifted the bucket over the lip of the sink; being a utility model, it was a bit high from her position and she couldn't see much of it.

A few minutes went by uneventfully, Nanoha returning with a couple of spare rags, and then walking over to help Hayate lift the now full bucket of fresh water out of the sink. She poured a bit of chemical solution in, dipping her rag and mixing it well, then set it on a table towards the counter to be equidistant from the two of them. They worked quietly for a while, and Nanoha burned quite a bit of her energy tackling the counter and display cases in record time.

"Nanoha-chan, have you ever lost a member of your family before?" Hayate asked suddenly, casually, as though she'd just asked something as simple as what Nanoha thought of the weather.

It was enough to make Nanoha freeze as she was finishing up the final display case, and a small knot began to develop in her stomach. Fate's words to her had been kind, true, and reassuring about their role in Reinforce's choice, but having to face Hayate herself, alone, was another thing altogether.

Concerned now, she left the case alone, and crossed to where the bucket sat. Sticking her hand in to rinse the rag, the water was still warm. That warmth reminded her of when Fate took her hand, and after a moment of remaining tongue-tied with Hayate working on a table away, acting as though she hadn't even asked such a loaded question, Nanoha eventually felt the courage to speak. "I haven't," she admitted in a quiet, somber tone.

"I see," Hayate responded immediately with her usual stock response, and while her voice did not hold any particular sadness, it wasn't happy, either. That, in itself, spoke volumes.

But Nanoha couldn't leave it like that. "I have some crazy hope I'll never have to."

Hayate looked to her and gave her a genuine grin. "You know, when you say it, it really feels like it might actually never happen."

Mentally, Nanoha berated herself for what she'd just said. She hadn't been thinking. "Hayate-chan..." she edged in, her tone miserable by this point, "I wish I could take it back."

Hayate seemed confused at first, then surprised. "Oh, no, Nanoha-chan!" She shook her head emphatically. "That wasn't what I meant!"

"Eh? But... well..." Nanoha seemed stuck again then shook her own head. "I'm really sorry. I just feel terrible about it myself. I didn't like the idea, I didn't want to do it, and I wish we could have come up with some other way. It made me feel sick, but- ah, this isn't really about me!" she cut herself off in her own rambling.

Hayate felt a bit of panic wash over her, making her chest feel light; Nanoha becoming high-strung wasn't making this much easier for her. She reached to her chest by reflex, something she'd done so many times over as the pain from the paralyzation caused by the Book of Darkness had become worse.

But this time, her hand met cool metal.

She gripped at it once, twice, then simply let her hand surround Reinforce's pendant. There was stillness for a moment, and Hayate closed her eyes to bask in the calmness that just holding it brought to her. "It's not that at all," she finally said.

Nanoha bit her tongue; she felt that she'd blundered the conversation enough for the moment.

"I didn't ever have a family I could remember. This summer, I received one." Hayate opened her eyes, and paused thoughtfully. "Something that everyone else had, I finally did, too. People I cared about, who cared about me, unconditionally.

"They wanted to be there with me, to celebrate the good times and be support for the bad ones." She rolled eyes a little melodramatically. "They were people to make food for besides just me. I can't tell you how many meals I ruined in that first week because I wasn't sure how to adjust the portions for more than just myself." They both chuckled a little, even if it did catch in their throats.

"Most importantly, even if their behavior seemed strange at times," she tilted her head to one side, "they were still mine. They _are_ still mine." There was another pause and Hayate took a deep, shaking breath.

Nanoha crossed over to where Hayate was and kneeled, putting her hands tentatively on the other girl's lap, wanting to comfort her. She remained quiet; Hayate's words were something it seemed that both of them needed to hear.

"And this winter, I gained another member to that family. She was... a part of me. Literally." Hayate smiled, but she could feel tears gathering at the corner of her eyes. "I even gave her a name." She fingered the tip of one of the pendant's prongs as a means to ground herself. "She was precious to me, in so many ways.

"But I did not know her that long before she had to leave." The smile had turned bittersweet and the tears now streamed down her cheeks unchecked. "I didn't... I didn't even _know_ her. So why does it hurt so much now that she's just gone?"

Nanoha also had tears standing in her eyes now. She reached out and enclosed Hayate’s free hand with her own and stared quietly at the other girl’s face to try to search for words. But even after a dozen or so silent seconds, she realized she didn’t have an answer. But she was obligated to say something. "It’s..."

A sniff from Hayate cut her off, but Nanoha didn’t know how to finish anyway. Could she be a friend to Hayate, as Fate had been to her a few days earlier? How could she, when it had been by her hands that Reinforce was no longer there? Still, here Hayate sat, asking _her_ the question.

"It’s just... it’s because it’s sad." Nanoha hesitated, and she wiped at the corners of her eyes. “She was a person, someone who did have a personality, a will. A pure will, that loved and cared _only_ for you, Hayate-chan. Losing that... losing her... is just too sad.” Feeling that her own tears were passing, if nothing else to help Hayate be strong, Nanoha stood to lean over and hug the other girl, lending her shoulder to rest against as Hayate was overtaken by her own tears.

"I don’t cry around the others," Hayate managed after a moment, but still clung to Nanoha. "I don’t want to cry around them."

Nanoha rubbed Hayate’s back as she leaned into her embrace. Slowly, things were beginning to click. "Because they’re sad also. You can see that, and you know that inside it makes you sad. And that you don’t want to feed the cycle."

The squeeze was tight. "Mm," Hayate acknowledged. She seemed to be regaining her bearings as Nanoha spoke and rubbed her cheek against her shoulder.

Nanoha took a large breath of relief and was content to stay hugging her for a while, but suddenly there was a knock on the windowpane of the front door. She jumped in surprise and looked out to see a very anxious Vita peering back. The very next moment, the young knight looked like she was about to break down the door, and Nanoha rushed to open it.

"Ah, Vita-chan-!"

"Hayate!" Vita yelled and ran over to Hayate, who was doing her best to clear her face. "What’s wrong?!"

The other Wolkenritter trailed in after Vita, but while they seemed anxious, they weren’t overreacting. It seems they hadn’t listened to Hayate’s request to meet at Alisa’s and come to pick her up personally. Each took a place surrounding Hayate, crowding her with their concern. With that, Hayate finally felt strong enough to let go of the pendant and reached her hands out to all of them and took a deep breath of her own.

And smiled.

Unquestioningly, the knights folded into her request for a hug. "You share my joy, as well," Hayate murmured against Zafira’s ruff.

"Always, mistress," Zafira rumbled quietly; he didn’t know the context, but the sentiment was the important part.

"Yes," Signum confirmed, an uncertain ghost of a smile on her own face.

Shamal was quietly supportive and Vita still looked anxious, but they both nodded.

Nanoha shook her head, smiling also, and felt her chest fill with the sweet display. She wasn’t about to interrupt.

After another few moments, Hayate said, “Well, this will be the first time you all have seen fireworks, won’t it?”

"I don’t think I’ve ever seen bursts of light in the sky, no." The scowl on Vita’s face only added to her sarcasm and they all laughed.

"Well these are different than what you normally see, Vita-chan. And won’t it be nice to not be fighting just to see them?" Hayate tilted her head.

Vita looked chagrined, and then nodded somewhat hopefully. "Yeah, I guess I’d like that."

"Good." Hayate took a look around. "But I think I’ve made a mess of the time that Nanoha-chan was supposed to be cleaning the café. Why don’t we all help?"

"Of course, Hayate-chan!" Shamal seemed cheery now that things were on the right foot.

"Let’s get to it, then," Signum agreed, keeping any protests Vita looked about to make quiet.

Nanoha bowed slightly, "Thank you for your help, everyone!"

The rest of the evening went by in a much more pleasant manner, and Hayate was reminded that together with her friends and her Wolkenritter, she was infinitely more found than lost.

**Author's Note:**

> For anyone who might care, my original thought was to write something more of Hayate being supportive of Nanoha after she'd been in the accident involving Vita depicted in Strikers. I still may write that someday. I'd like to see it, and I've yet to find anyone addressing it.
> 
> By the time it gets to Strikers, it's just very obvious how close they've all three girls had become, so this became an exploration of how at least two of them became closer. And well, my other thought was to have another piece set just after this one where Fate might commiserate about losing her mother with Hayate, strengthening the bond between those two as well.
> 
> Maybe all someday. XD


End file.
